Sun Flour Baking Company

When you are hospitalized, you better be nice to your nurse. . .
. . . even if you feel miserable. An authoritarian businessman learned the hard way after ordering his nurses about as if they were his employees. But the head nurse stood up for him. One morning she went into her room and announced, "I have to take your temperature." After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled, crossed his arms and opened his mouth. "No, I'm sorry The nurse said, "but for this reading, I can not use an oral thermometer."
This started another round of complaining, but eventually he turned and bared his bottom. After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce, "I must get something. Now, you stay like that until I get back! "She left her door open a little on his end, and he cursed under his breath and heard people walk past his door laughing.
After nearly an hour, the doctor of the man entered the room. "What is happening here?" asked the doctor.
Furious, the man replies, "What, Doc? Have you ever seen someone having their temperature taken? "
"Yes," said the doctor. "But never with a carnation.
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A man was told his work colleague one day. . .
. . . that the company was transferring him to Chicago. He said he would quit before having to settle there. When asked why, he replied that he was simply too afraid of all crimes, even if he had to go to a big salary increase and greater benefits. his colleague said he should reconsider. Chicago is a beautiful city, with world-class museums, charged with a great history, sites, good public transportation, etc. Then he said: "Why I myself worked in Chicago for almost 10 years, and during this time I've never had a problem with crime while I was working. "aeĻ aeĻ The first asked" What were you doing there? "aeĻ aeĻ which the other replied:" I was tail-gunner on a bread truck. "
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The old cowhand came riding into town on a hot, dry, dusty day.
The local sheriff watched from his chair in front of the room as the cowboy wearily dismounted and tied his horse to the rail a few feet before the sheriff.
"Howdy, stranger ..."
"Howdy, Sheriff ..."
The cowboy then moved slowly to the back of his horse, lifted its tail, and put a big kiss where the sun does not shine. He dropped the horse's tail, got on the walk, and headed towards the swinging doors of the hall.
"Hey Mister ..."", sheriff?"
"Did I just see what I think I just saw?"
"Remember you did, Sheriff ... I bought myself some powerful chapped lips ..."
"And that cures them?"
"No, but it keeps me Lickin 'em".
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The Doughboy Pillsbury died yesterday. . .
. . . a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California grapes, and Captain Crunch. The site falls was piled with flour.
As a longtime friend, Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who never knew what he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.
It was not considered a very smart cookie, lose his dough on half-baked schemes. Although it is a bit flaky at times, he even as a crusty man, was regarded as a model for millions of nominal. Towards the end, we thought that rises again, but alas, it was not tart.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, the clay, two c.